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On Hold

On Hold

“We have decided to put our Bible study on hold until after the holidays.”

I’m part of an Encinitas Christian mom WhatsApp chat, and I just read the above message. I get it; I am in the midst of all of it. I have been burning my candle at both ends the past month, and when I look at the calendar through Christmas, I am preemptively exhausted.

I’m tired. Moms out there, I know you are nodding your heads in agreement. So much is expected of us, both visible and invisible work. We feel the pressure to be the best parent and provide the best for our families.

I confess that I have said “yes” to too many gigs in the past months due to the fear of not having enough money. And while there may be truth to the need for money to provide for resources, I have sacrificed so much time with my son and husband in the process.

Going back to the WhatsApp message. Yes, I get it, but today I was suddenly struck by the fact that we are all sacrificing some of life's most vital practices for the sake of societal pressures. We are canceling Bible studies to plan fall harvest festivals. We are foregoing Sunday worship to take our kids/grandkids to sports. We are saying “yes” to more work in order to afford a vacation instead of spending time with our families now.

Our real lives are on hold because we have created this mess. What do we do now? Here are some thoughts:

Pray - Ask God to relieve the anxiety and pressure we feel as modern day parents. Pray for guidance, for ourselves and for our families.

Reprioritize - If you feel that life is too busy, then it probably is. Figure out what is most important to you and your family. Commit to what is most valuable.

Say no - If something does not match up with your family’s priorities, say no. If you are feeling overwhelmed, say no.

Shut out the noise - There is endless pressure from social media, friends, coaches, and other parents. Don’t get caught up in the world’s noise.

Worship as a family - This could mean worshiping on Sunday morning. Or, you could read the Bible and sing hymns together at home. You could also attend our new monthly worship night; there’s one Wednesday, October 16th at 7pm in the high school room.

As I conclude this article, here is a prayer I composed for tired parents:

Dearest Heavenly Parent, you know the pains, struggles and joys shared by earthly parents. We are caught up in perfection, clouded by the ideals of social media. We feel immense pressure to act certain ways, be involved in particular activities, and belong to the right social groups, for the sake of our children getting “the best.” We confess that we are exhausted, Lord. Forgive our foolishness for not turning our troubles over to you. Help us reprioritize our lives so you, our Faithful Father and Gracious Mother, are always at the center. Relieve our guilty minds and energize us for the life you call us to live, a life of love, peace and community. Amen.

Elizabeth Virkler Director of Worship, Music and the Arts